Celebrating 17 Months and 13 Days of Blogging

On this completely unorthodox anniversary of this blog, I have decided to revisit all of my posts since the very first awkward introductory entry.
I choose this day of all days because today I decided to actually use that Twitter account that I so painfully created months ago. I'm using it to tweet my blog posts to my... zero followers...

After re-reading my posts for the first time since I wrote them (some more than a year ago) I realized that I would like to add my little captions to each of them.

Just think of this post as the Jackie Was Just Wondering blog equivalent of Ricky Gervais' and Stephen Merchant's Video Diary of the Making of Series Two of The Office but with a much shorter title. Let us commence:

Um... Hello... Hi...
And so it began. This little adventure in internet life-recording that I have come to know and feel ambivalent about (10 points to anyone who guesses what TV show that line is from). Concerning the post, my name is still Jackie and I am still of the female persuasion; however, I am now 20 years old and counting. I also still stand by what I said. If you don't like what I write, I don't care. Although if you're reading this, I'm assuming that for some reason you like it.

Wow, Nothing's New
This is one of my least favourite posts as it sounds like I'm keeping a diary of my actions without any injections of my signature (*giggle*) half-assed sense of humour.

Holy Cupid, Batman!
As you have quite possibly deduced by reading my blog, I do not talk about my love life. This post was the closest to talking about it, but it was merely mentioning the fact that I did not have one. Note the past tense of that sentence. Wink wink. *Shakes head*

Keeping Myself Busy With Daniel Day-Lewis
I still love him.

And The Oscar Goes To...
I don't think I've ever used so many adjectives in one writing sample before... It's probably like a 1:3 ratio of adjectives to all-other-words, and that's pretty darn high.

Plays, Plays, Newsies, American Psycho, and More Plays
Plays are cool. They satisfy the "Pretentious and Dramatic Yet Intellectually Stimulating Arts" slice of my Arts, Literature, and Entertainment Needs pie chart.

So This Is What Heaven Looks Like...
The first broken link of the review. There will be many, many more to come. I'm not going to fix them because that negates the in-the-moment spirit in which these posts were written. If you are really that sad about clicking on something that no longer works, look it up yourself... or get a hobby, like masturbation.

Days of Past and Future
I was right. It was boring to read. *eccentric hand flourish*

Extra! Extra!
I never got that tattoo...

Hum Drum
That link still works. There are new drawings there too, in case anybody's interested... *crickets*

The Unbearable Lightness of Monotony
Metaphors are cool. They allow me to use hyperbolic analogies in order to place emphasis on my feelings toward a certain topic or situation. There. Now you know...

Vive! Sort of...
I still love Hugh Laurie. Quite a bit more now than when I wrote that post because I am now completely educated as to his dramatic and comedic genius. That's right. Genius.

Clucking Bunnies, Speaking French, and Bermuda Shorts Day
More broken links. Sheffield Enterprises Inc. can kiss my asterisk.

John is Definately the Cutest Beatle
So can SOFA Entertainment. I do suggest you look up those videos though. If you thought Justin Beiber's fans were insane, wait till you see 1960's Beatles fangirls!

Some Bad Short Stories
All of those links are broken. Fortunately for you, you will just have to take my word for it that they are all bad. However, I am still writing to this day so I guess I never learn...

Das Ist Der Perfekte Tag (...Not Really)
*Writer is skipping the review for this post because she cannot think of anything witty to say about such a menial entry*

Out and About
To this day, I cannot watch more than 30 seconds of Angel's death/funeral scenes in Rent without crying like someone was sawing my leg off.

Satanic Housewives
I thought it was a pretty funny prank. Some people just can't take a joke...

Spring Has Sprung Then Withered
I still have that phone.

They Grow Up So Fast...
The tomato plants didn't fare so well in the end.
The link is broken.
I only saw about half of the movies listed.
End scene.

The Heliocentric Model
Life Lesson #437 - Subsection B: You can never ever EVER go wrong with baked goods made with chocolate chips.

Viva La Coldplay!
I went to Michael Buble's concert two nights ago and it was incredible! He has an unbelievable voice and he is such a natural comedian, I could go see him a million times and never get bored. He was STILL a very close second to the Coldplay concert. That's saying something!

Reminiscing About Old Good Movies
The 12 Monkeys link is broken. I haven't actually seen that movie all the way through. I thought I should mention that. Does that make me a bad film fan?

That'll Be The Day (When I Actually Study For A Test)
No reply yet from The Human Statues. I have faith. Any day now.

Why Do People Watch Dr. Phil?
I am actually watching Dr. Phil as I type this. For reason 3, in case you are wondering. I hate him.

The World Was Shaking So Much I Couldn't See The Pretty-ness
Johnny Depp is still awesome, but I didn't need to tell you that. Oh, and the poll has obviously disappeared. Walter is still here though. Please feed him.

Takin' A Much Needed Vacation
Batman, Spiderman, and Superman are each one word. Mystery solved.

Home, Home On The Range
The word "touch" was inadvertently removed from my vocabulary for 24 hours following that blog post. I almost didn't want it back but there it is.

How Will I Survive Work Now?
Tim Horton's is the shiz. I've never been so proud to be Canadian.

My Hand Really Hurts For Some Reason
Turns out I smacked it against something while drunk with friends the night before. That, ladies and gentlemen, is class.

I Love American History
I still heart Edward and James, and I don't mean British royalty. I also enjoy the fact that this post has an "anonymous" comment from persons yet unidentified. It's a small ray of hope that I'm not just sending these blog thoughts aimlessly into cyberspace never to be seen again.

My Love/Hate Relationship With The Internet
I can't afford champagne. My real friends will just have to accept IT favours from me as proof of friendship.

Developing Addictions and Contracting STD's
I quote "There is a new show called Glee that I really wanna watch." Oh, me-from-a-year-ago... You had no idea just how big that "new show" would become.

Going Green Equals Economic Recession
Oh boy. Activist-Jackie should be gagged and bound, thrown in a vat of ice cream and sent down the Bow River.

La Passegiatta
I've been working on my presentation skills since that little catastrophe. I think I've solved the part where I... hmm... Well, I've definately worked on that thing when I... uh... At least I've noticed that I need to...
Oh, who am I kidding? I should hire actors to do my presentations for me, or at least video-conference them in via satellite.

Keen on Keane
I mean, what other title could I have come up with? The band's name is Keane and I like them, I couldn't just ignore the play on words. Please.

Where The Wonderful Things Are
Of all the broken links and videos in this blog, the Footlight Parade video is the one that saddens me the most. For obvious reasons...

Crease of Distant Dark Places
Good song. That's it.

If Wisdom Teeth Are So Wise...
I would like to add tonsils to the list of body parts that don't need to be there. Not that I've had problems with mine. Just saying.

Dishonourable Mention
I highly recommend "The Ricky Gervais Show" which is an animated version of said podcasts. A vivid depiction of what goes on in Karl's brain. It really opens the eyes, stretches the mind, and tangles the perception of the human species.

You Can't Post Videos In A Conversation
Now I wear make-up every day. I think I have just passed into womanhood.

The England Story
Urban Dictionary defines beening as water that is so hot that it's cold, or vice versa. That actually, quite shockingly, fits the situation fairly well.

Ten Thousand Lightning Bugs
OK, so Adam Lambert's career didn't end quite as abruptly as I thought. However, he won't last much longer. I'll see to that...

No Longer Missing-In-Action
Yes, I realize I never gave the name of the show that I love so much (and am currently rewatching all the seasons of). If you care enough to watch it yourself, you'll go and do a little research to find out the title. It takes effort to be a fan of such an incredible show, they don't just hand out fandom badges willy nilly.

Show Business
That is one grotesquely terrible poem. However, of all of the writing-related disciplines, poetry was always my Achilles heel.

Just Think of All That You've Missed
I found a toonie with gum on it and a five-dollar-bill with blood on it not too long ago.

Why Can't I Own A Canadian?
Sociopathic entrepreneurs = Americans. That's right. I said it.

Apparently, I Used To Be Skinny
I still watch As The World Turns. Dr. Oliver and Eric Sheffer Stevens are still awesome. I am still not as skinny as I used to be...

Oh Ray, How You Light Up My Day
If I was the dilligent secretary that I never want to be and have actually been keeping track of all of the idiotic things my mom says, we'd be on Quote #8579.

Running From Short Sleeves
It sure is taxing on the central cooling system of the body when I wear my leather jacket everywhere because I refuse to show my arms in public.

Keeping It Real and Prepping For The Fall
To add to that list, I went to the bank yesterday to get my credit card activated, all by my lonesome. Go me.

Backstreet's Back, Alright!
This was only two days ago. I don't have anything else to say about this one. Geez. How much do you want from me?!


Wow, that took all day. I hope you appreciate it. I had a mediocre amount of fun.

Done.