Speaking of which...
LOST
Jackie's USB Flash Drive
If any of you see this valuable possession, please message me. It contains some important and classified* files that I need immediately.
Defining Characteristics:
- on a keyring with some candle charms and a little magnetic key device
- 16GB Staples brand
- probably sporting an expression of sadness and bewilderment due to the fact that it is now homeless (or perhaps in the hands of a thieving stranger, in which case you should use assault-level force in order to retrieve it.
Reward: I'm broke, so all I can offer you is my endless and unconditional friendship. However, if you are a dude, I am not above making out with you for a bit. The USB is THAT important.
Anyways, on with the subject of today. I am venturing into a little investigation into Google's suggestion mechanism. When you type in a letter or a word, it will show you suggestions that also start with that letter or word. I haven't figured out what fuels these suggestions. It can't be the most popular or the most recent, so I'm not sure. If you know, please let me in on the secret. You may remember that I did one experiment in a previous post "Why Can't I Own A Canadian?", but I figured it needed further exploration. If you type 'why' into Google, it still comes up with that result. At least when I do it...
OK, here goes:
Forget about Osama Bin Laden. Forget Carmen San Diego (even though she is the shiz). I wanna know where Matt is! Somebody tell me where Matt is! Good Lord, maybe Google knows...
I bet he's sitting in front of his iMac, Googling himself; right before the internet crashes under his heavy stare.
What I love best about this one, is just how close the two searches "world of warcraft" and "world health club" are to each other. To me, those two seem like opposite goals.
I often use Google to find out what time it is. In this day and age, chances are there is someone else in my time zone, at this exact moment, using Yahoo Answers to ask yet another person in my time zone, at this exact moment, what time it is. Right now.
Losing an iPhone, frustrating. Losing an Alberta Health Card, a big hassle. Losing your voice, unpleasant. Losing a baby? I think in some circles, that's called a misdemeanor. If you don't look for your baby after you lose it? My cop friends call that a felony. Don't worry, I don't think the cops will go the felony route. You did look for it, after all. Using Google.
OK, that's enough for now. I win Google patrons. I win.
Ogle.
* They aren't actually classified files. I just figure that people will look harder for it if they think they can look on my drive and find documents about how Megan Fox is actually a cyborg run by the CIA to infiltrate the Hollywood studio system.
